Birdwell Beach Britches welcomes you to our low tech web site    SCROLL DOWN >>>>\/

Telephone us to place an order or for answers to questions: 714 751 2071 or 557 7040 ... only family answers the phone. That's my mom, Vivian; Sam is my son, and me: I'm Evelyn. We  have enough answers in stock to match up with your questions, but if we don't? We'll make one up, on the spot.  Our phones do have hold buttons, we even use it in certain circumstances, but customers deserve our full attention. If both lines are busy, call back in a few minutes. We begin answering the phone around 5:00 in California's morning, that's Pacific Time Zone and we do Daylight Savings Time (DST). We stop at 3:00 in the afternoon, except on Friday when we close at 2:00 PM. 

CHEERS   \o/ \o/ \o/ \o/    and    \o/ \o/ \o/ \o/   HURRAHS

The major work incentive! IT'S PAY DAY! And then we get the weekend! God is Good to us

There is no answering machine or voice mail. 

This is a factory. We have no space for a store or show room. When the work load is so great that we go into overtime, there can be no time allotted to walk in customers.  WALK-INS ARE SUSPENDED. We still do The WILL CALL  bit: place the order online or over the phone, request will call, and we will telephone you when it is ready to pick up at your convenience.  (Well, it's always best to arrive when we are around. Otherwise, entry becomes difficult and the only customer service is the policeman who shows up within a few minutes...) 

Please order early to give us time to ship for your vacation, weekend or whatever. We will work with you, but sometimes Super Quick is beyond doable. Most orders ship within 5 working days: during busy months more time is required especially if we have to build it for you, so it might be a good idea to have a second choice on color if you are in a hurry, just be sure to tell me that those three colors are in order of preference and how many you want. A NEW PROBLEM: when you use One Order Form to order, please (please, PLEASE!) write the color you want on the proper line, (For instance, 33/color + 38/color; 303/33/color + 301/38/color) and the substitutions in the dialogue box. If you write it twice, far out! Use the dialogue box for the reiteration. You should consider Ben Franklin's philosophy and be a pessimist: figure on  8 days to ship, 15 days to build -- so you may be pleasantly surprised. 

UNIQUE PRODUCT -- founder: CARRIE "SURFIN' GRANNY" BIRDWELL MANN -- UNIQUE BUSINESS

"If our logo isn't on it, it just isn't a Birdwell." Now there is even more to worry about! Apparently, Someone out there in the great world that is Not US in America, is not only copying our Britches, but they are even duplicating our LOGO -- Isn't this called bootlegging? or is it piracy? -- They are putting that Bogus label on items -- even shorts! -- that are not built or authorized by us: Family Birdwell in Southern California. We have never given permission for our Logo to be embroidered or printed on any item. No matter what the salesman or the clerk or anyone else says. They'll say anything to make the sale. When/if there is a problem, the customers are coming to us. We are very sorry, but we cannot guarantee items not made by us so we have to insist upon a proof of purchase. Any suggestions? Besides the Britches, we make accessories: jackets, beach shirts, walking shorts, long pants and Tote Bags. We also put our Logo on short sleeve T-shirts, long sleeve T's, hooded sweatshirts, tank tops, crew neck sweat shirts, beach towels, banners, calendars, and mugs. Nothing else. Those hats and board covers are using the Logo without permission. We have never given anyone permission to register our trademark in another country. When in doubt: contact us: EBIRDWELL@aol.com Our colors are red and black with white. Authentic Accessories are red and black. We use white on dark colored items. Some designs like the Heart are playful colors, but our logo is printed elsewhere in the correct colors. If you are in doubt about an item, ask us. Some people are printing accessories without permission.  all authentic BIRDWELL BEACH BRITCHES are built in the United States of America, in the State of California, in the County of Orange, in the City of Santa Ana; Zip Code 92705 (and have been since 1961 That's before we HAD zip codes and, some of you may remember: The first factory was 1710 W. First St., Santa Ana, Ca. 92703 -- about 5 miles away from the present address) 2129 - 2141 So. Wright St., Always using American Made Fabrics and other Ingredients: they are constructed by American Citizens who are proud of their skill and of the product they build. We are a happy shop. Our suppliers know that we want Made In U.S.A. materials and do all they can to supply us. This is sometimes difficult -- thanks to those who believe jobs and factories belong in other countries -- and has been more expensive for several years. This is changing: "Make it cheap but charge American". Our suppliers deal with many countries, but that doesn't mean we have to buy it.  Still and all, MADE IN U.S.A. is not the only major thing about BIRDWELL BEACH BRITCHES. We simply make a durable, comfortable, good looking suit with all the expertise at our disposal. We are proud of our merchandise. We feel humbled by the praise of our fans.

 All Birdwell Beach Britches have velcro fly, wax pocket at right rear, 3 lace band, and 2 layers of fabric.  Occasionally, you will find a Britch with the same color lining, which makes it look as though there is only one layer. Check it out: I think the whole shop would rebel if we asked our Craftsmen to build a suit with only one layer of fabric. If you order anything other than regular it is a custom Britch. And: We do not make custom suits until we are certain of your size/style/fabric requirements. Even if you need it NOW. I mean, think about it: What if the size is right but the style is wrong? Or visa versa? If there is such a rush, order a stock Britch.  ATTENTION: Custom is not the same as Tailor made. We do not do Tailoring. Custom made Britches  are those that we build with stripes, checks, vents, extra or special pockets (key pockets do not make it custom.) and other options. Custom  suits are not exchangeable or returnable (thank you). We do not copy the patterns of other companies, so please stop asking us to do so. If, say, you wear size 34 in almost every other brand and tell us our size 35 is too large, we cannot build a custom Britch for you. If you are not in our data base we will send a tryon, you tell us how it fits and we build. We have no way to sell custom no matter how wonderful they are. You can make us take them back, but we won't build another custom for you. You have just joined the Thousand Club. We never refund shipping/handling fees. 

We are taking a vote: those who think we should pay all the S/H charges and increase the basic price by $10, and those who pay the freight even if they don't much like it. Come on! Here's your chance: I have several hundred votes to leave it as it is. Like nil for raising the price to pay for free shipping.

YES: THE  ORDER FORM USED TO BE HERE. IT IS NOW LOCATED AFTER THE BLURRY PICTURES AND THE COLOR CHART, SIZE INFORMATION AND FABRICS: the answers to your FAQs -- IMPORTANT INFORMATION. 

I ALREADY KNOW WHAT I WANT SO JUST LINK ME TO THE ORDER FORM 

 We love your comments, and appreciate your questions ... a question not asked often results in The Wrong Size, Color or Style shipped to you. And that means another S/H charge to you! Say it in your own words, but remember I only have two languages: American and English -- and English was a required subject in school. 

Please do not spend 22 emails discussing what you want -- and then say, "that's what I want, when can you ship" -- you know what you want, I only answer questions. I don't remember all your decisions. Write it down and send it to me with the name address and payment information.

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keep scrolling. the hard news comes now

is always before the fun part.

The method of payment is up to you, though we do not accept American Express, Paypal or Discover. Heck, we used to say, "Cash on the Barrel Head ..." Now we have this great new technology and it's "Payment on Credit/Debit Card Approval ..." Which is pretty wonderful when you think on it. Best not to use Debit Cards though, because of the extra charges through the bank ... though refunds are faster in case of exchange. To you and to us ... MasterCard, Visa and Diners Club. Check the appropriate box if you want to mail a check or money order. 

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shipping and handling is part of the money: all packages ship "the best way"

and that means that it goes UPS or USPS PRIORITY MAIL or DHL for overseas.

ALL PACKAGES: AT LEAST DELIVERY CONFIRMATION --  If there is a problem I will give you the tracking number ... (I will also track the package: I can't stand not knowing.) If you give us your email address or screen name, we ask UPS or USPS or DHL to send a notice. Please don't telephone or mail your order and expect email confirmation of receipt of order or shipping information.

We are not set up to provide tracking numbers as a general service without the email.. 

$11.50 for the first item, add $1.00 for each additional item.

(don't worry, we still go by weight/cost so 3+ items are charged accordingly.)

our speed limit is as fast as we can go: No Extra Charge.

After That, IT IS UP TO THE CARRIER. 

 ... ups, usps and dhl are all reliable carriers ... 

ALWAYS REMEMBER: Sometimes GOD SAYS, "NO"

UPS 2nd DAY IS ABOUT $25 -- NEXT DAY IS ABOUT $56.00

usps, the post office, charges AROUND $25.00 for next day but it isn't available to all locations and it isn't guaranteed delivery. WE TELEPHONE USPS FOR THAT OFT TIMES INACCURATE INFORMATION. 

we do not use fed ex:  The way bill takes way too long to fill out and it's two miles to the drop off station.

Hawaii is different: If you ask for UPS, you will pay what UPS charges us which is more than Main Land USA. Best to give us your postal address.

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At least once a day someone asks, "When will it ship?"

 WE TAKE ORDERS IN SEQUENCE. If the item you want is on the shelf, it will probably ship in the next day or so; during the busy months it can sometimes take 5 to 9 days. Give us 6 to 10 working days if we need to build the suit, more during busy season. We are quick, but we are still a small shop. We work hard all year to build stock to supply the needs of our customers. Now, if your order had to be built, that suit (s) goes to the head of the shipping line as soon as it is completed. You go first. You ordered first. Overnight, 2nd Day and Walk in customers are after you. 

My son, Sam, has come back to Birdwell's to work and he is now working receiving, telephones and about anything we throw at him. He is an immense help and very knowledgeable -- he's worked here off and on since he was 13 years old. The carrier brings your exchange/return, but it isn't actually Received until it has been processed through the computer. It's actually more time consuming to do receiving. Receiving is also on first come, first serve basis. When you call just to see if we have received it? We check the computer, if you insist and we have to look through the daily totes for the package, your package goes to the end of the line ... it doesn't get moved up to Next In Line, but it does stay in front of the packages that have no return name (legibly written). 

OVERNIGHT: I really hate to talk about this one. I want to get the product to you in time, but it's not always possible. (See previous red paragraph.) We can't just pull, pack and write your address on the envelope. It must first be processed in the computer and credit card terminal. Another new happening: if you tell me you really want it tomorrow and it is possible to do so? You have requested expedited carrier service and will be charged accordingly ... No more of this wishy washy stuff and nonsense. You know the difference between right and wrong, fair and unfair. You don't want to join the One Thousand Club. If you ask for expedited service, but I don't remember when I quote the price? You are charged for the service you receive. Okay, go ahead and teach me a lesson. Welcome to the Club. 

Always looking for a loop hole. If you write that you need the Britches by a certain date, we try to do it. If we succeed but you have ordered the wrong style/size/color we will still try to make the original day unless you tell us otherwise. If we cannot, it won't receive expedited shipping. When you email or telephone that you need to exchange, we generally manage to get it pulled and shipped by the next carrier pickup. After all, your place in line was last week, right? If you don't change the shipping method, we don't either.

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email for a free paper brochure or to simply ask questions, whatever ...

EBIRDWELL@aol.com

now for the nitty-gritty. aka: the most important stuff, or

  Prices listed here are for MEN'S sizes 27 inch to 41 inch waist. Other prices follow. Ask for a paper brochure EBIRDWELL@aol.com Sorry, but we simply cannot send paper brochures to an email address.

	STYLE 301: THE MID THIGH BASIC Approximately 15 inches long = out seam 3 LACE WAIST BAND HAWAIIAN PRINT	42.50     47.50
	STYLE 303: THE LONG BASIC -- 3 LACE WAIST BAND Approximately 18 inches long = out seam LONG BOARDERS FAVORITE HAWAIIAN PRINT is loose-fit style 363 --  303 is custom and not returnable or exchangeable.	$42.50     47.50 57.00
	STYLE 305: THE SHORT BASIC -- 1 LACE WAIST BAND  MAKES IT SHORTER FROM THE TOP AS WELL AS THE BOTTOM. Approximately 14 inches long = out seam HAWAIIAN PRINT	$42.50   47.50
	STYLE 307: THE NAT'L LIFEGUARD SUIT Approximately 14 inches long = out seam 3 LACE WAIST BAND, LEG VENTS (slits) AT THE HEM HAWAIIAN PRINT	$42.50     47.50
	EVERY STYLE WE MAKE IS A LIFEGUARD SUIT TO SOME GUARD UNIT: GUARD PATCHES COST	$2.00
No Pictures. They look like the 303's Just loose fit	STYLE 363: LONG LOOSE-FIT BASIC Approximately 18 inches long = out seam TWO SIZES LARGER IN THE BODY HAWAIIAN PRINT	$44.50     47.50
No Pictures. They look like the 303's 3 inches longer	STYLE 323: LONGER BASIC Approximately 21 inches long = out seam HAWAIIAN PRINT	$48.50   50.50
No Pictures. They look like the 303's 3 inches longer Just loose fit	STYLE 333: LONGER LOOSE-FIT BASIC Approximately 21 inches long = out seam TWO SIZES LARGER IN THE BODY HAWAIIAN PRINT	$48.50     50.50

As promised, here is the chart for other sizes: Always remember that Birdwell's come in every inch -- including infant, toddler, preschool, grade school and etc. Sale Items are listed in blue, as available so you need to be flexible in color choices. Please don't specify a color and demand On Sale. Request a color with a substitute if you want the sale price. Another loop hole discovered. You wanted royal and on sale. We didn't have it, and told you so. The threat worked: you got it on sale. One color toddlers are no longer on sale, even if it is on the shelf. Added a member to the 1000 Club.

*Just Like Daddy customers are hard to measure. The first time you measure, they like to show you how big they are, the second time they remember the itchy creepy tape and get skinny. They are very flexible.

WE RARELY RUN OUT OF THE MOST POPULAR COLORS, STYLES, SIZES IN THE FULL PRICE SURFNYL BRITCHES.  There are hundreds of suits on the shelves. When a popular color gets low, we build more immediately. 

Our suppliers know we want made in U.S.A. And that is what we buy. Sure, they also carry fabrics made in other countries, but that doesn't mean we buy it. People who are Made in the U.S.A. have the right to say anything they want to say. We wonder why they choose to string words together that equal an untruth.

DRYING TIME FOR ALL OF THE FOLLOWING FABRICS: 5 MINUTES.   

normal use durability: 10 years. 2 to 5 for lifeguards (time to put on your shoes)

SURFNYL: IF YOUR RE-MEMORY IS FROM 1970, AND YOU BOUGHT THE BRITCHES FROM A STORE OR YOU WERE A LIFEGUARD?  YOU ARE REMEMBERING SURFNYL. IT'S STILL GOOD FOR ABOUT 5 TO 10 YEARS DEPENDING UPON USE AND ABUSE. 

OTHER FABRICS: the 10.00 305s are sold out

normal use durability: 25 years. 

SPINNAKER: THE FIRST NYLON WE USED AND THE TOUGHEST OF THE NYLONS. THIS IS THE ONE THAT EARNED THE TITLE "BULLET PROOF". IT ISN'T: don't stand in front of a gun. THE MILLS DON'T MAKE IT ANYMORE, SO WHAT WE HAVE IS THE END. IT IS NEVER EXCHANGEABLE WHEN WE BUILD IT FOR YOU, AND WE DON'T BUILD IT UNTIL WE ARE CERTAIN OF YOUR REQUIREMENTS. WE STILL HAVE A FEW COLORS, BUT WE ARE RUNNING OUT. IF THIS IS THE FABRIC YOU ALREADY KNOW AND LOVE, TALK TO US. We will not build a suit of this fabric until you have tried on a spinnaker Bargain Britch.  And no more of this: I didn't know! silliness. Be cool. If we built it for you? And you return it? We will refund only the amount we can maybe get from it in 2 to 5 years ... $30.

+ + + + + + + + +

normal use durability: 15 years. 

COMBAT: OUR SECOND FORAY INTO NYLON AND THE NEXT TOUGHEST, IT IS A THICK, SOFT, SATIN LIKE FABRIC. IT FEELS WONDERFUL! THE MILLS DON'T MAKE THIS ONE ANYMORE EITHER. THIS IS THE ONLY NYLON WE HAVE EVER USED THAT IS A SINGLE LAYER OF FABRIC: IT IS SO THICK AND TOUGH THAT ANY WEIGHT of LINING BREAKS NEEDLES.  WE HAVE NO FABRIC LEFT TO BUILD NEW SUITS. HOWEVER, WE DO HAVE SOME MADE UP IN STYLES 301 AND 305: BARGAIN BRITCHES: $20 EACH. Most of these are one color suits. 305s are 20.00 each, but are not available in most sizes.

+ + + + + + + + +

normal use durability: 15 years. 2 to 5 for lifeguards

OXFORD: A DIFFERENT WEAVE, NOT SMOOTH LIKE THE OTHER NYLONS. PEOPLE STARTED ASKING FOR COLORS THAT WEREN'T AVAILABLE IN SURFNYL, MOSTLY HOT OR NEON, BRILLIANT ONES. UNBELIEVABLE THAT 40 COLORS WEREN'T ENOUGH, DON'T YOU AGREE? BUT WE DISCOVERED A WONDERFUL FABRIC THAT IS A CROSS BETWEEN SPINNAKER AND SURFNYL THAT COMES IN TRULY GREAT COLORS. WE HAVE OLD GLORY BLUE, TURQUOISE, GRAY (DUCT TAPE); HOT ONES: YELLOW, LIME, ORANGE, PINK; ALSO WE HAVE SOME WHITE, BLACK, AND ONE OR TWO OTHERS.  We have to make it, but it isn't custom -- we treat it as a stock fabric.

+ + + + + + + + +

DRYING TIME FOR THE FOLLOWING: 8 MINUTES. (ENOUGH time to ALSO comb your hair)

normal use durability: 10 years. 2 to 5 for lifeguards

TECTYL: IN 1991/92 WE TRIED ANOTHER NYLON. 100% NYLON THAT LOOKS AND FEELS LIKE COTTON. THIS IS BECOMING MORE POPULAR, AND HAS A SOLID FOLLOWING, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO MAKE IT EXCHANGEABLE, IT IS NOT A STOCK ITEM. WE HAVE A FEW COLORS (RED, ORANGE, PURPLE, ROYAL, NAVY, BLACK, DARK GREEN, MAYBE BURGUNDY) CHOICES ARE VERY LIMITED. IF THIS IS THE FABRIC YOU KNOW AND LOVE, TALK TO US. EBIRDWELL@aol.com  If we build it for you? And you return it? We will refund only the amount we can maybe get from it in 2 to 5 years ... $30.

+ + + + + + + + +

normal use durability: 12 years ... NO COMPLAINTS YET ... TIME TO PUT ON YOUR SHOES AND SHIRT.

THE PRINTS, AKA: CALIFORNIA STYLE HAWAIIAN STYLE FLORAL PRINTS: WE'VE BEEN SELLING THESE SINCE 1992 WITH NO COMPLAINTS. THE FABRIC IS DURABLE, THE COLORS AND COLOR COMBINATIONS TOTALLY GREAT. STOCK (NOT EXCHANGEABLE IN STYLE 303.)  STYLES ARE: 301, 363, 305, 307, 323, 333.  WE WILL MAKE THEM IN ANOTHER STYLE IF WE ARE CERTAIN OF YOUR SIZE REQUIREMENTS. WE TRY TO KEEP CERTAIN COLOR COMBINATIONS, BUT IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO MAINTAIN STOCK OF ANY PARTICULAR DESIGN. The Cubist,  Digital, Batik prints are on sale for 30.00. If we build it for you in another style? And you return it? We will refund only the amount we can maybe get from it in 2 to 5 years ... $30. We can build a Floral Britch for you in other styles: add 10.00 to regular style cost. And if you have a friend who received one of the Batik, etc. prints as a promo and you want one also free, you have to place an order for a full price suit. There are no 363 Batik promos in sizes 40 and up.

+ + + + + + + + +

DRYING TIME FOR THE FOLLOWING: TWO WEEKS -- OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

CORDUROY: WE HAVE SOME OF THE GOOD OLD FABRIC -- OFF WHITE  -- IN THE LOCKER THAT WE CAN USE TO BUILD WALKING BRITCHES. CORDUROY WAS NOT POPULAR FOR SO MANY YEARS THE MILLS 'FORGOT' HOW TO MAKE THE GOOD STUFF, AND WE ARE ABOUT THE ONLY COMPANY TO PREFER TOP DURABILITY.  IN OTHER WORDS, IT IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO BUY THE TOP QUALITY FABRIC YOU REMEMBER -- MAKE THAT: IMPOSSIBLE (the only color left is the off white.). WE ARE BUYING THE BEST POSSIBLE, THOUGH WE HAVE TO LINE SOME OF THE LIGHT WEIGHT FABRIC. WE HAVE A VERY GOOD DARK GREEN. GRAY, SLATE, NAVY, RED, DARK BURGUNDY, BROWN, KHAKI, OFF WHITE ... ASK US. IT CHANGES FREQUENTLY. Sometimes while you are writing the order. 

CANVAS: GRANDMA BUILT THE FIRST BRITCHES WITH 10.10 OUNCE ARMY DUCT CANVAS.  TRY TO FIND IT NOW! IT'S POSSIBLE, BUT WHO WANTS THE COLORS AVAILABLE? AND WE DON'T WANT TO BUY 3,000 YARDS OF A SINGLE COLOR. WE BUY THE BEST FABRIC AVAILABLE, BUT IT HAS A SUPER TENDENCY TO SHRINK. WE HAVE ALWAYS BUILT THE CANVAS BRITCHES TO SHRINK WHEN WASHED, AND IT USED TO WORK. IT DOESN'T ANYMORE. WE HAVE BEEN FORCED TO ADD A SPECIAL LABEL: HAND WASH HANG DRY -- YOU SHRINKEE YOU KEEPEE ... BUT THAT APPLIES TO ALL OUR MERCHANDISE.

DENIM: Various weights, colors aren't specific yet. Not too much call for it, but we do have it. Sometimes even the color you want. Navy, light blue, black.

Men and Women wear these Britches, but they don't use the same method of measuring because men and women are built differently. You probably noticed that already.

HOW TO DETERMINE YOUR BIRDWELL SIZE

METHOD #1.    MEN -- THE RULE! is to add 2 to the size you wear in everything else. We are not measuring your body. You do that when you buy clothes: add two to get the Birdwell size.  What size Levi's or other solid waist pants fits you the best? Add two. We know you wear them low and loose: that's the style. Add Two. You don't wear them low and loose? Add two. The actual difference is about 1 5/8 inch, but add two gets it 97% of the time.  

WOMEN -- see the purple and pink directions below. We do not have patterns for women. To the skin, measure your waist at belly button level: pretend the naval is the top grommet of the Britches. Then, seven inches down from belly button, measure that part of your hip. Not the widest part, we aren't measuring you. You are supplying the measurement for the Britches. 

METHOD #2.    To prove METHOD #1, the rule, do the following. This way is the most fun, but not so very accurate: Especially if you store wisdom in your mid-section, see Method #1.

FIRST: You need a soft tape measure -- the one in your tool box just won't work. Neither does a ruler or yard stick. Sending a string is almost as amusing as a strip of elastic.  THING THE SECOND: Stand at ease, but not too at ease! Pretend you have already been on the beach for 30 or 40 minutes. Measure your waist-waist at belly button level -- then where you usually wear them.  THING THREE, length: Stand straight, have someone measure you from the top of your jeans/pants down the side of your leg to the length you want (aim for 14", 15", 18", 21"  -- stock lengths). I do not need this measurement to the skin. When you measure your own leg, some part of you bends to make an invalid measurement. Another thing about length: if you measure a product from a different manufacturer, it might not be satisfactory when applied to Birdwell Beach Britches. THING FOUR: This is not as difficult as it sounds. We work with you to get it right. It does cost extra S/H each time we do an exchange, so it is important to get the correct measurements. Remember that we are not tailors.  

METHOD #3.     Measure the pants you usually wear. If you measure the same inches as the pants you usually wear, you are holding it in. 

METHOD #4.    Don't laugh! This is a real popular, albeit expensive, method. FIRST STEP:  order the same size in BIRDWELL'S that you wear in everything else. SECOND STEP:  With a large smile of anticipation open the package.  THIRD STEP: $*%#&@#%*$ (curse, bitch, hiss, moan and/or groan) STEP the FOURTH: email ebirdwell3@aol.com or telephone us: 714 751 2071 or 714 557 7040 to tell me what you want in exchange.  Additional shipping/handling charge. 

I think this may be the proper place to add the following:

One more thing about size: don't think inches, think comfort. Birdwell's are a very solid fabric with no elastic, no give, no flexibility. Our sizes are determined by real American Inches instead of the metric system or the new vanity sizes. If Birdwell's fit, they not only look terrific but you feel wonderful: almost as though you were wearing NOTHING. If they don't fit, it shows and you are not a happy person. And don't you buy swim wear to be happy? Looking good is part of that. Else you'd wear cut-offs. The first Birdwell was made for a surfer who wore the toughest cut offs available -- Levi's. But the rivets scratched the board ... hot wash, hot dryer, hot tub will shrink BIRDWELL'S -- the wrong direction. Plus: the guarantee disappears and they look ugly. So please don't buy large, thinking 'shrink to fit'! It doesn't work that way. You cannot shrink real Birdwell's to fit. Another thing: if they are too small, you will be so uncomfortable within half an hour that you will hate the day, and the product. If they are too large, they will Go South with that first big wave or the plunge into the pool. Most people don't care over much for that experience.

SIZING FOR WOMEN

women also love our Britches -- they call them: boardshorts!

We make Men's Clothing so all of our patterns are for men. Still and all, Women love them, and are demanding to know how to order. Here is the way I figure the size a woman needs: Measure your waist to the skin at bellybutton level. Measure your hip to the skin, seven (7) inches down your side from bellybutton level. Length to the hem line can be done with clothes on, but get someone else to hold the soft tape measure. I know you are not going to wear them this way, but if you measure otherwise they won't fit. I promise. You see, I am actually using your body to measure my Britches. Think this: the top grommet is the belly button. There are exceptions, but not very many and some women just can't wear them. (I've used Purple in the chart below as an example.)

We will only do the same sort of adjustments we do for the men's styles. We will not shorten the rise. Custom suits are not exchangeable. Cost is the same as the Men's styles. Please do not ask me to recommend a custom suit without the initial try ons. I cannot see you. I am only an expert in Usually.

phone: 714 751 2071 or 557 7040 with any questions. You can always click the link: EBIRDWELL@aol.com I try to answer email every evening.

PUT ON YOUR THINKING CAP! It's time to decide which of our 40+ colors you want. The easiest way is to remember the color you were thinking about when you decided you wanted a new pair of Britches. Computers cannot show the subtle shades of colors. Even those brand new PC's that Say They Do Great Color. So, this is still the way we do it: 

ATTENTION: Colors are listed from lightest to darkest,  *  items are shown in the graphic ... the word graphics show 21 colors ...  MAIZE, *LEMON, *YELLOW GOLD, HONEY GOLD, (bronze) -- HOT LEMON CORAL, *MED. ORANGE. *LIFEGUARD or INT'L ORANGE, BURNT ORANGE -- HOT ORANGE "when you think *red..." THAT'S LIFEGUARD AND MOST POPULAR RED", WATERMELON (DUSTY ROSE), OLD GLORY RED (DARK RED, BRIGHT BURGUNDY), hot pink (burgundy is the shadow color) *burgundy (maroon), *old glory red IS bright burgundy like wine lt. blue is powder blue, *sky (carolina), Federal blue (slate), *royal blue, navy blue, old glory blue is bright navy/dark royal the mill calls it "eggplant"... it is the color you think of when you think *purple. (royal is the shadow color) aqua (pale), *Kelly, jade, *dark green (forest, hunter) olive (green khaki), hot lime=neon teal, dark turquoise: shades differ from lot to lot, oxford turquoise. when you think brown*, this is it. tan/khaki*, paprika (see the outline?) and of course we have mix the two and you get Shades vary from lot to lot, mostly medium gray, not charcoal or very pale. Oxford gray is silvery gray -- duct tape. prints are simple floral designs. we try to keep the following combos we have others -- take a chance     this list are floral prints. The two color ones are custom, we don't offer them here because they are not returnable. the new birdie print: red, navy, dark green, orange all with white line drawings I built an actual online ordering blank and I've listed the accessories on that page. The current version allows you to simply write what you want. I don't need item numbers: just write the style, size and color ... as many as you want. As with every new thing, the kinks are there to teach what isn't known. So if you encounter a problem, let me know and I'll try to fix it. But I really can't make it like everyone else's. We have way too many options. EBIRDWELL3@aol.com  CLICK ON THE GRAPHIC  BELOW TO LINK TO THE FORM.  HINT: READ THE REST OF THE SITE BEFORE YOU CLICK THIS GRAPHIC TO THE SECURE ORDER FORM. THERE IS A COLOR CHART, DESCRIPTION OF FABRICS, PICTURES OF THE 4 MAIN STYLES -- NOT VERY GOOD PICTURES -- SALE ITEMS, A FREE CHUCKLE, SHIPPING/HANDLING INFORMATION...       It's as secure as AOL, our Web Host, and our computer system can make it. All information is transferred manually to the main frame computer  at work which does not have an Internet Connection. You can click on any of the BLUE LINKS: EBIRDWELL@aol.com to write mail: If you want a brochure, please write your name and address with your request. If you don't want to use a Credit/Debit card, that's all right with us. Click on the ORDERING GRAPHIC above, fill in the information, and write your email address in the space provided: I will email the amount due so you can mail payment. I will create an account for you and wait for your check or money order. OR Print the following form and mail or fax to us. Here's how: Highlight the following order blank: click edit, click copy, click write new mail/page, click edit, click paste: now you have the copy of our short order blank. 1.    Print two copies, write in the information required, then re-write it -- you'll find out. (But -- thank goodness for white out!)  This is usually used by those who pay by check or money order, or want to order by Facsimile machine OR: 2.    Copy to new mail: write EBIRDWELL3@aol.com in the Send To Line, and your screen name in the cc line. Then fill in the information and send mail. 3.    Or use the online ordering form. Just click on the above graphic CLICK TO ORDER. Please DO NOT email this form with your c/card information!  NAME ADDRESS CITY STATE                        ZIP CODE TELEPHONE email visa or Mastercard:                     exp. date cvc # style fabric size color how many cost total                                           IMPORTANT - - FACTS: We do CUSTOM work only when we know your requirements. Custom ALWAYS costs more! CUSTOM work is NEVER returnable. We are NOT tailors. We DO NOT copy other brands. They copy us. Only stock styles/sizes/colors are returnable. THERE IS A TELL TALE SEWN INTO EVERY SUIT: WE CAN TELL IF IT'S BEEN WASHED, USED OR WORN. With 40+ years of experience? We can tell if you wore it for half an hour or 15 minutes, if you subjected it to heat, if the product was abused. We can also tell if it is the fault of material or workmanship or if you snagged it on a splinter. But we have always sewn in the Tell Tale. If it is our fault, it is covered by the guarantee: we repair or replace the suit when accompanied with a proof of purchase. (If you bought the Britches direct from us, we will have the information in our data base) We did have one very weird year! One in a thousand abused the suit, then claimed the guarantee... Quite a change from our regular clientele! Water people have always been so honest! I hope Uncle Bob has it right when he says: "It's the same percentage, just more customers."  Well, we are getting busier, so we now have a One Thousand Club with a Special Chapter for returning Custom.. We are striving towards minimum a Membership. New members for the year 2006 totaled: 18. New members: 2007 total: 8. With 4 on parole.  2008: 12 total with 3 on parole and 2 earned Never Again. Beginning a new count for 2009:  10 MEMBERS THOUSAND CLUB 2 on PAROLE* 8   MEMBERS  SPECIAL CHAPTER AKA: NEVER AGAIN *HEY, MAN! ALRIGHT, ALREADY.  YOU GOT A REPRIEVE!   Just don't do it again. Welcome  back. NO. You can't click for a list of members. They know, we know and it's no one else's busy-ness. Some folks are so proud of belonging to an exclusive club, it seems they are begging to join! It has been suggested that we simply charge admission and save wear and tear on my nerves.  Please pay particular attention to disclaimers disguised as conversation. Membership count is reduced to zero at the beginning of our year, but we have peripheral memories. Probation is new. One man ...   CUSTOMER SERVICE does not mean that a person can demand a thing and get it.  CLICK ABOVE TO TALK TO US.

If you are a group, a team, a few friends -- or Just You! and you want to purchase 5 or more stock styles, you qualify for Group Pricing. The Group Rates are listed on the last page of the Price List in our paper brochure. Minimum discount is $5.00 per stock Britches when 5 to 9 pair are purchased. Maximum discount is $9.00 when you purchase 40 to 49 Britches. No, you can't buy 10 and return 8 and still qualify for the discount. So you can stop that noise.

TEAM: everyone wants the same color, though the style of Britches can vary. ALL CAN HAVE THE SAME CUSTOM WORK ($1 less on the discount) and we allow the members to also order a one color second suit at the same discount, or to contribute towards a higher discount. Wholesale pricing is available for city, county and state units.

GROUP:  different colors and different styles allowed. NO CUSTOM WORK.  5 to 9 pair = $5 per discount. 10 to 19 suits: $6 per. 20 to 29 suits - $7 per. 30 to 39 = $8 per. 40 to 50 = $9 per. 

ALL INDIVIDUAL CUSTOM WORK MUST BE ONE ON ONE. If you are not in our data base, we WILL NOT build custom for you. We send a tryon, you tell us what is right and what is wrong, we build. If you somehow convince us that you know Birdwell's and understand the rules, we will build without the tryon. If you return it, you become a member of the Special Chapter of the 1000 Club and we will not build another custom item for you. No matter how loud you cuss at me. 

EBIRDWELL@aol.com

Wow! You read the whole thing! Remember: we are a factory, open Monday through Thursday from 5:30 am to 3:00 pm, Friday from 5:30 to 2:00. We are also closed for some holidays: Easter is Good Friday, Memorial Day Monday, Independence Day: closed on the 4th or the Monday/Friday, Labor Day, Thanksgiving Thursday and Friday! This year, 2009, we will not have a vacation: we sill be closed December 24 to the 28; also December 31 until January 4, 2010. 

Evelyn

Carrie Edith "Surfin' Granny" Birdwell Mann celebrated her 99th birthday on August 23, 2000. On August 31, 2000 she decided to spend eternity with Grandpa. We miss her. Heaven is happier. 

I still have six brothers. Two of them just happen to reside with God. Walter John Richardson,  Long time employee of Birdwell's, entered the Richardson family as my brother #5 on February 10, 1950. On May 2, 2005 he joined #3 brother, Lawrence Ray Richardson (December 17, 1946) who passed May 29, 1971. We are shook. Heaven is laughing with his wry humor. 

Emailto: EBIRDWELL@aol.com

01/14/2010